How to feel comfortable with my partner

We tend to project into our relationships everything we feel, how we see ourselves, how we appreciate ourselves. Generally, this is exacerbated when it comes to a couple relationships because it is the most intimate, the closest, and the most transparent. Feeling comfortable and sure of yourself will help you maintain a more sincere, stronger and more authentic relationship, without taboos. In this article we are committed to loving relationships based on trust, respect and sincerity, so we want to explain how to feel more comfortable with your partner, because in order to fully enjoy their company it will be key to avoid the pain and suffering that you causes your own insecurity.

Steps to follow:

• Do you feel anxiety? Do you suffer when you are with your partner? Don’t you feel completely free, safe, and happy? Do you think that there are barriers and that you are not 100% yourself when you are alone? If any answer to any of these questions is yes, there is a problem in your relationship. You are blocking yourself and that can cause conflicts within your relationship.
• There are signs that will tell you that you do not feel sure of yourself and, therefore, you are not comfortable with your partner:

1. Filling a need for love and attention constantly.
2. Feeling the need for him to approve of everything you do, to feel good and not to dislike your actions or words.
3. Feeling anxiety and fear about the possibility of having a breakup.
4. Being possessive and even spying on your guy.
5. Search your partner to feel complete.
6. Distrust your boy, even if he has not done anything that could make you doubt.

• To overcome these fears, the first thing you must do is detect that something is happening to you. It is called insecurity and it can because you dislike for wanting to achieve just the opposite. You must be clear, mainly, that you have the problem and, in no case, your partner, even if you insist on focusing on it. It is your thoughts, your perceptions and your conditions that do not let you free yourself feel yourself, be you. Do not ask him to change his way of being so that you can adapt, if you want to feel comfortable you should work yourself to erase everything that prevents you.
• Find your inner conflict. To begin with, this work is internal and very mental; you will have to look for the origin of your insecurity. What is it that causes you fear? What is it that keeps you from being who you really are? Who are you really? Reflect on your behaviors when you are in a relationship and discover what you are afraid of. The only way to overcome the discomfort of your relationship is to stop creating a parallel reality and face your fears.
• It may be the shortcomings that cause you insecurity, so ask yourself, also, what it that you lack is.
• When you do not feel comfortable, it is because there are anxieties that are manifested with such behaviors, concerns or thoughts, from not finishing being comfortable with your body, to feelings of inferiority. Overcoming these types of thoughts is the key to being able to untie yourself from all those thoughts that have you trapped and do not let you advance in your relationship.
• Do you know what the main problem of insecurity is? Well, basically not knowing who you are, not loving you and not trusting yourself. Realize that you focus on your partner all your shortcomings and then you suffer it, so it is time to face your fears and enjoy your relationship. The key is to create a nucleus of trust between the two of you with which you can explain what is happening to you, what you feel, what your concerns are. There may be something in him, in his attitude or behavior that encourages your discomfort, so it is time to communicate what worries you so that between the two of you can find a viable solution, especially if it is your intimate relationships, if there is any something that blocks you is better that he knows.
• On the other hand, it is important to know your partner in depth in order to be 100% comfortable in your relationship. To do this, you should know what their interests are, what you have in common and what you can contribute by being you, in pure essence.  Do not stay superficial and do not create insecurities about it, knowing her origins, her family, her childhood or adolescence, will also make you gain security in your relationship. Remember, above all trust and communication.
• Working on your self-esteem will be essential to overcome your insecurity. If you don’t feel comfortable with yourself, how do you want to be with your partner? Work your interior and, if necessary, you’re exterior. Change what you don’t like about yourself or just accept it. For example, if you have a few extra pounds, you have two options: assume it and live happily with it or put the batteries to achieve your ideal weight and feel better. Think that there is nothing better than feeling good about yourself, because that is what you will project in your relationships later.
• First of all, he loves you; you must be very clear about it. You know what their feelings are towards you and you should not doubt the being who loves you the most. Remind yourself on a daily basis that he is with you for a reason: he likes you just the way you are. Because of your physique, your character, your way of being, thinking and feeling.  Don’t let your own clouds flood with negativity what you are building together. Who knows, perhaps what makes you most insecure is what he likes the most about you. Talking about it will be essential to regain your confidence in yourself.
• Be very patient, you already know that it is the remedy for almost all problems. Relationships do not change overnight and neither do people, so it is a matter of creating a suitable climate, little by little, with trust, respect and communication. First with yourself, then with your partner. If you have faith and desire to solve this problem, have no doubt that you will achieve it, you will!